You See That Sign That Says Rib Tips?

"I wonder if these guys know the Commodores?"

I'm watching Nat'l Lampoons Vacation and all of a sudden I'm overwhelmed with a sudden feeling of loss. For some undefinable reason I feel suddenly ashamed that I haven't seen The Kurz since December. I haven't seen Tommy Okktane since November.

I'm a terrible friend. I need to fix that!

Totally off topic: SADD staged their annual fake drunk driving accident yesterday. They call it the "mock crash." We took the juniors and seniors out to the street in front of the school to watch the show. It totally fell flat.

Not since I went to high school with a broken leg and a song in my heart have I seen a lesson so totally wasted on an unreceptive audience. I don't know how much it cost us but I know donations average $2,500. Those donations are to cover the costs that aren't absorbed by the police and fire departments who "volunteer" their time on the clock. They aslo volunteer the towns trucks and squad cars. The result is one hell of a dissapointing show.

The problem is that thanks to CGI editing with realistic shading on CGI models, a phoney car crash with real cars looks glaringly phoney. Maybe this kind of thing had an impact in 1989 but too little, too late. Tokyo Drift and Grand Theft Auto have taught my kids a physics lesson in ways I never could. They see clean through the hokey staging of a couple junkyard wrecks set dressed for maximum effect. It's too bad. The kids who found it funny are the kids who need to learn the lesson the most. Perhaps it should be manditory for parents to attend. They're the ones who have a chance of actually changing their kids behavior. And they're not so jaded that the lesson doesn't sink in.

By the way Kurczy, it appears that my psyche thinks you're a fucking drunk. Pot, meet Kettle... Kettle thinks I'm black too.

The highlight is that there was enough time at the end of the period that I got to see the tow truck flip the upside down car back over. They pulled it up to stand on one side and then a bunch of fire men pushed it over to the wheels. It was a Mitsubishi Eclipse convertable. The A-pillar kept it from crushing the roof to the doors. I'd buy one.

If I were in charge of this show, I wouldn't be stirring up a witch hunt for teens driving drunk. Teens got the message years ago. They really aren't driving drunk the way we did. The sensational stories are the statistical outliers. The new thing is trunking. The law of unintended consequences has trumped the junior operator laws. Kids don't need to be told not to drive drunk. They need to be told not to drive like assholes in general. Drunk driving is so 20 years ago. Hiding that extra kid who really wants to see the movie too is the current witch needing to be hunted.

Maybe SADD needs to make adjustments to their script.